3rd grade is tough

I'm totally biased but Jane is absolutely the coolest kid around and when she comes home crying about not having many friends, it breaks my heart in to pieces. She held herself together until she saw me and the tears poured down her face. She recently became friends with a little girl because the little girl is teased and didn't have any friends either. 

Third grade has been tough on Jane and dealing with her own insecurities and self confidence makes having friends very important because she wants to feel part of a group or included.

Jane asked me to have lunch with her at school yesterday. It meant the world to me that she wanted to acknowledge me at school and as difficult as it was to plan around having a sick kid at home and a needy three year old, I knew I needed to make the time for her. I'm so glad I made it to lunch because I saw a little glimpse of what she goes through everyday. I noticed her anxiety as soon as we walked into the lunch room.

 She walks into lunch very anxious because finding a table is impossible when you have no one to sit with other than the little girl who is teased by the other girls. So once we paced the room a few times she finally sat down at an empty table. I looked around and noticed she was very nervous. I made a comment to her about how glad I was that we got the table to ourselves so she wouldn't feel so bad about not having a lot of friends to sit with. We started eating and her friend was sharing Oreos with a girl at another table. Then another little girl got upset because she wants some Oreos too. Jane whispered to me that those girls tease her friend a lot and so she only shares with the nice girl at the table. I smiled and pretended it wasn't a big deal that her friend feels bad about herself also because of the teasing from the other table. We spent time talking about her day and she told me things that had happened and it turns out she is being teased herself by some girls. I knew she was having troubles but she never opened up like she did at lunch yesterday. I hung out with her as long as she needed me and eventually she and her friend were the only third graders left in the lunch room. They finally decided to play outside at recess but I knew Jane was hesitant to even go outside and play. So, I stayed with her for a bit longer while she lingered in the hall looking at pictures and she eventually went out to recess. 

I went home and cried a lot. 

So, when Jane got off the bus today and was upset again, I knew things were not getting better but worse. She wants to have friends and even wanted to plan a party so maybe people would want to be her friend. I agreed to it and after the bus fiasco today, she wasn't in the party planning mood. 

Being a parent is tough. Seeing your child suffer and not being able to jump in and fix it, is the pits. I see this beautiful soul trying to be a friend to anyone and everyone, especially the ones who need it most. Putting them first and making every effort to be a good friend. I am so grateful she has plans this evening because otherwise the bus issue would have been more difficult to get through. Even with the plans, she still wanted to be included so badly and we both knew that it was impossible. 

Say an extra prayer for my sweet Jane because her heart is hurting far worse than mine that is crumbling as I write this.
**Many thanks to the 2 friends she has for always being a great friend and mending her heart the best they can**