Adoption

The hubs and I were at dinner last night with Jane and Adeline while Mary attended a birthday party. Ryan and I were talking and he asked me when he can adopt Jane. In the past we discussed waiting because of her dads' obligations. So when this came up in conversation, I was a little hesitant to bring it up again. So I said we can look into it and see what we actually have to do. Another reason I wanted to wait was because of her heritage. I wanted her to have the opportunity to learn about it and I need her birth father for that. So, the more I thought about it and as I think about it today, I am researching the steps to adoption and want to talk to her dad about creating some sort of scrap book or symbolic family tree for her about the Jindal heritage. That way if she ever gets curious or just needs a sense of security I can't offer, she can look at it. I guess I'm curious to know what you all think...so leave a comment. Regardless, Ryan wants Jane to be his daughter and that means more than anything else in the long scheme of things! 

Happy Saturday!

Comments

  1. MeganMarch 3, 2012 at 2:41 PM

    So, it's Megan G, I clicked on your link through Facebook and figured I should let you know who I am since I haven't commented before. ;) You ahould always do what feels right in your heart. Since I don't know the full situation with her father it's hard to say, but I do have friends and family members who are adopted or who have been raised by step parents without contact with their biological parents, and I can say that as long as she feels like she has somewhere she belongs, she should be ok. Being a biological contributor to someone's life isn't always what is most important-sometimes being there physically and emotionally is more important in the long run. I have a feeling she will grow up looking at Ryan as her father regardless, so if adoption,is what feels right, go for it. She's young, so it's hard to know how things will effect her later in life, but as long as you're open to answering questions later, I'm sure everything will be just fine.

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  2. michelley77March 3, 2012 at 3:41 PM

    I think it's soooo awesome that Ryan wants to adopt janey bug. And I love your idea of making a scrapbook about her heritage! I would say.... That's pretty much the best of both worlds!! ;)

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  3. KathyMarch 3, 2012 at 8:38 PM

    Jane is getting old enough that she would have some understanding of this. I certainly have much to say about adoption! And since Ryan grew up with an adopted "sib"...and wants to adopt...it must have worked for him!! As far as her heritage, you live in a wonderful community where there is a great deal of diversity. Also, jane has an interest in the part of her heritage that comes from her biological dad, so learning about it will come natural to her. Maybe talk to her "Aunt" Laura? She would have more of the view through Jane's eyes. I like was Megan has to say above. The important thing is for Jane to always feel loved by Ryan no matter what his legal title. You will always have my support whatever and whenever you decide on adoption.

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  4. UnknownMarch 5, 2012 at 10:27 AM

    I can somewhat understand your situation...as I hope whomever I end up marrying would want to adopt Emerson. I think it's awesome Ryan wants to adopt her. I also agree with finding out about her heritage. I don't think you have to put a hold on the adoption to let her know about her heritage though. You're just going to have to talk to her birth father and figure out what works best with you all. Hopefully he is cooperative...which is what I am worried about in my situation. I wish you two the best :) <3

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